Chapter 469 – Jin He’s Distress
The next day, Zhou Yan brought Jin He over.
Zhou Yan was quite friendly and greeted Lu Xia warmly upon seeing her. He also praised the triplets. Jin He was a bit shy, and it was Lu Xia who took the initiative to start a conversation with her.
After a brief exchange, Jiang Junmo mentioned wanting to discuss the content of the design plans and took Zhou Yan to the study, leaving Jin He and Lu Xia in the living room.
Lu Xia noticed that she was still reserved, so she brought up some topics related to the children and started chatting with her.
“Oh, by the way, why didn’t you bring your daughter? I heard Zhou Yan really likes her, and I wanted to see her.”
Upon hearing this, Jin He furrowed her brows unconsciously and explained, “She’s staying at home with my mother-in-law.”
“Hmm?” Lu Xia was surprised by this information and then smiled, saying, “It seems like your mother-in-law also really likes your daughter.”
After hearing this, Jin He’s troubled expression deepened, and she replied, “Yes, she does like her. She usually takes care of her.”
Seeing her troubled expression, Lu Xia was a bit puzzled. After some thought, she decided to ask directly, “Is there something wrong with that?”
Jin He seemed surprised by her direct question and looked at her with an unexpected gaze.
Seeing her reaction, Lu Xia continued, “Jin He, don’t be mad at me for being straightforward. I’m just a bit curious. From what you’re saying, it seems like your in-laws really like your daughter, and they don’t have a preference for sons over daughters. They even take care of the child themselves, which is great, isn’t it? But I sense that you’re not very happy about it.”
Jin He sighed, perhaps because she hadn’t had anyone to talk to about her troubles for a while. Moreover, she thought Lu Xia, who had returned to the city with them, could understand her, so she shared the parts that made her uneasy.
As it turned out, her parents-in-law were initially not very pleased that their son had married a girl from the countryside.
After all, although they weren’t very well off, they were both workers. Even after her mother-in-law gave up her job to avoid having her daughter work in the countryside and let Zhou Yan’s sister take the job, their family was still relatively comfortable.
Not to mention that Zhou Yan was now a university student.
However, they were not ungrateful people. Zhou Yan had indeed received help from Jin He’s family during his time in the countryside.
So they accepted the marriage.
But they weren’t particularly fond of Jin He as their daughter-in-law.
Especially after she moved to the city, she seemed quite inexperienced in many ways, not up to their standards.
After giving birth to a daughter, she was very careful, afraid that they favored boys over girls.
After weaning, Mother Zhou took the child to raise her personally.
From Jin He’s perspective, it was because they looked down on her and were afraid she wouldn’t be able to take care of the child well, so they didn’t allow her to get close to the child.
So she felt particularly distressed and didn’t know who to talk to, so she walked around with a sad face all day.
Of course, all of this was inferred by Lu Xia from her post-return experiences.
After listening, Lu Xia thought for a moment and said, “So you haven’t told Zhou Yan about these things?”
Jin He shook her head. “I didn’t know how to say it. I know it’s because I haven’t done well enough. My parents-in-law have been quite good to me, considering they didn’t mistreat me. It’s my own fault.”
Upon hearing her words, Lu Xia sighed. Indeed, according to what she said, her parents-in-law were still alright. Even if they didn’t like her, they didn’t mistreat her. If she could adapt well to city life, learn from her mother-in-law, maybe they could accept her.
But she suddenly changed her environment, her husband lived on campus, and she only went home occasionally. She couldn’t adapt on her own, and without much confidence, things just got worse.
*
Chapter 470 – Lu Xia’s Advice
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Lu Xia remembered when she first saw Jin He, she had worries in her eyes, but she was still full of longing for city life.
But now, all that was left was distress.
So, the most important thing for her at the moment was to change herself. She couldn’t continue like this, or it would only get worse.
And a crucial part of changing herself was to boost her self-confidence. Additionally, she needed to get out of the house; staying home all the time and avoiding people would likely worsen the situation.
So Lu Xia thought for a moment and asked, “Have you thought about finding something to do?”
“Finding something to do?” Jin He shook her head. “Where can I find something suitable? There are so many returnees to the city now, and they can’t find jobs. It’s even harder for me.”
Lu Xia shook her head. “That’s not what I meant. I’m asking if you have any skills or talents.”
“Skills or talents?”
Jin He thought for a moment. “I’m good at cooking. Zhou Yan used to love the meals I cooked, but after coming back to the city, my mother-in-law didn’t let me cook. She only let me assist. She’s afraid I won’t cook cleanly.”
She didn’t say the last part, but from her mother-in-law’s insistence on her washing her hands multiple times before cooking, she could guess the reason.
Lu Xia’s eyes brightened upon hearing this. This was perfect!
So she suggested, “You could try selling cooked food, maybe buns! Selling meals might be complicated, but selling buns is a good idea.”
“Selling buns?” Jin He was startled by the suggestion and quickly shook her head. “No, I can’t do that. I’m afraid of getting caught!”
Lu Xia chuckled at her reaction. “What you’re saying is outdated. The government has already issued regulations allowing private sales. There are bun sellers at the entrance of our alley every day. They come early, and the buns they push sell out quickly. They have no trouble selling.”
“Really?”
Jin He found it hard to believe. She hadn’t gone out much after returning to the city, so she had no idea the changes outside were so significant!
Lu Xia smiled and affirmed, “Yes, you can ask Zhou Yan if you don’t believe me. Many people are doing business outside now.”
Jin He nodded, but then hesitated, “But…even if it’s possible, I’m not sure if my parents-in-law will agree.”
“Then you convince them to agree!”
Lu Xia offered some advice. “Moreover, you can’t just stay at home all the time. If you don’t earn money on your own and have to rely on your mother-in-law for everything, you won’t have any independence. If you can earn money, you can decide what to buy for yourself, and you can also buy more things for your child, getting closer to her. Later, when you’ve earned enough money, you can go to night school, gain a diploma, and then you won’t have to worry about not matching up to Zhou Yan!”
This was heartfelt advice and struck a chord with Jin He.
In her in-laws’ home, she felt most belittled when it came to spending money. If she could earn money on her own, it would be ideal.
Also, what Lu Xia said about night school, if she could improve her education, would her in-laws look at her differently? Would people outside not think she wasn’t good enough for Zhou Yan?
Thinking of this, Jin He started to consider the possibility.
Seeing Jin He’s interest, Lu Xia suggested further, “Don’t rush to make a decision. You can have Zhou Yan accompany you to take a look first and understand the market. If you think it’s feasible, then proceed.”
Jin He nodded, “Okay, I understand. Thank you, Lu Xia!”
She was genuinely grateful. During this time, she couldn’t express her distress. After all, in the eyes of others, she was already living a good life. Her parents-in-law didn’t mind her, and her husband was capable.
No one knew her struggles.
She hadn’t expected that Lu Xia not only understood her but also helped her come up with solutions. In this moment, she unilaterally regarded Lu Xia as her best friend.
I mean, this doesn’t really change the immediate problem. She’s looked down upon and isn’t even allowed to raise her own child! How many years will it take of doing business and studying before she’ll be accepted?
“being looked down upon and isn’t even allowed to raise her own child.” was quoted from her perspective. She’s already had inferiority complex before she met her in-laws. Her feelings about the experience was valid and it shows how much important it’s for her. But, we still have to consider her inferiority complex if we want to give balanced advice for her. And that’s what LX did.
What her mother in-law does so far can be malicious intended. But, it can also simply “well-intentioned” deeds, but not thoughtful enough. So, it unintentionally hurts her feeling. Take the “washing hands multiple times while cooking” for example. I do that, especially when I go back and forth between 1. [opening and closing refrigerator and the kitchen sets’ door to get food materials and utensils] and 2. [cooking, processing the food]. Those doors are touched tens (if not hundreds) times a day by multiple hands with various degree cleanness. So, it’s not necessary because her MIL thought she’s dirty/not-clean-enough.
PS. I go back and forth while cooking because I don’t have a large enough preparation table (area) to process the food. It’s less than 30 x 90 sq cm and it’s challenging to cook enough food a whole family on it. Ofc, it’s different story if I only cook instant noodles without any vegetables and other additional food in it. Given how small the city housing for workers in this story setting, I think their kitchen would have similar situation.